How To Make a Real-Life Krabby Patty From SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

Plankton may have had a tough time getting his hands on the Krabby Patty secret formula on Spongebob Squarepants, but that’s probably because, in addition to coming up with easily-defeatable plans, he’s also a tiny creature not capable of overpowering much. We’re humans, though, so surely we can use our superior brains to figure out what’s in this beloved burger. That’s what YouTube channel Binging with Babish did, and his logic is both sound and potentially disappointing (via Tastefully Offensive).

His thought process is this: Mr. Krabbs’ is famously frugal, so instead of splurging on special or premium ingredients for his burgers, it’s all a clever marketing campaign to hide that fact that there isn’t anything special about them. He says that if there is a special ingredient, it could be King Neptune’s Poseidon powder, which we equates to MSG, so he throws that, and the rest of the Krabby Patty fixins’, between two buns and he winds up with what we’re sure is a pretty tasty burger.

If that doesn’t satisfy you, though, YouTube commenters have some ideas that could make sense in the context of the show while making it darker than any of us realized. A beef patty doesn’t make sense because cows aren’t exactly ocean dwellers, but one commenter suggests that it could be made from whale:

“In real life, a dead whale carcass can sustain an entire fish community for over a decade. The theory says that Krabs came upon a dead whale and took all the meat to be used for the patties (since he’s cheap and it’s free). This is also where he found and decided to raise Pearl. Now the REAL f—ed up part is whether or not Krabs is raising Pearl out of the goodness of his heart… or just waiting for her to grow up to use her as the next source of meat.”

What do you think the Krabby Patty secret is? Is it as simple as Babish suspects, or is Pearl’s fate not an ideal one?

Featured image: Nickelodeon