We’ve all got something that is keeping us going through the current COVID-19 crisis. For some, it’s comics or binge-watching your fave TV show. For others, its zoom chats with friends. But for John Oliver, it is the strong and stoic silhouette of Adam Driver. Over the last few weeks, Oliver has used Last Week Tonight to highlight just how strong his feelings for the Star Wars actor are.
The writers on the show are clearly enjoying this recurring bit as they’re getting to come up with stunning lines like this one:
“Choke slam me to hell you nasty shed. Jam your mandible claw down my throat you irredeemable steer.”— Braddington (@bradwhipple) May 18, 2020
I. CANT. BREATHE‼️😂 pic.twitter.com/pmuge49zVx
The monologues have slowly been getting more Driver focused, with mentions of the actor popping up each week.
No matter what the topic, Oliver manages to bring it back to ol’ Adam.
John Oliver preaching what we're all feeling about our pensive bison, Adam Driver.— ♦️Krista Ren (she/her) 🦋 (@KylosWidow) May 18, 2020
Rude Large Man
Big Unwashed Buffalo#adamdriver #johnoliver #lastweektonight #hbo pic.twitter.com/O6wQo5TmTH
Sometimes Oliver just puts together random words that somehow still end up fitting.
It’s not just that Oliver thinks that the actor is hot—he definitely also wants Driver to do bad things to him.
This Twitter user has done a very impressive job of collecting some of Oliver’s best Driverisms here:
john oliver describing adam driver:— rini. (@baumbachbitch) May 18, 2020
- rudely large man
- brooding mountain
- fuckable redwood
- big unwashed buffalo
- pensive bison
- relentless hillock
- unacceptable monstrosity
- meaty oak tree
- nasty shed
- irredeemable steer
- forlorn block
- menacing obstacle
Oliver himself has wondered if he’s crossing some lines here. Driver is a private person and this obsession is beginning to become a very big part of Oliver’s self-isolation schtick. Surely the end game here is to have Driver make an appearance on the show. The actor has proven time and time again that he has a good sense of humor so maybe it could happen. We would personally love to see Driver turn up, maybe just to ask Oliver to stop… or even better to physically dominate him and make his dreams come true.
Whatever happens next we’re glad Oliver has found his own personal—and relatable—coping mechanism during this trying time.