War is coming to the Marvel Cinematic Universe–an Infinity War, to be precise–and with it will come countless casualties. This time around, it’s not just going to be minor characters dying in order to impel our heroes to action; rather, as directors Joe and Anthony Russo have indicated, Avengers: Infinity War is going to feature the permanent deaths of some major players in the MCU. While your inner comic book fan may be raising an eyebrow (because no one stays dead in comics for very long), the Grim Reaper is coming to collect in Infinity War and will be taking some poor, unfortunate souls with him. We have our own office deadpool going to determine who’s going to live and who’s going to die, and given our sterling track record with theories coming to pass, we’re feeling pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good about these odds. On today’s episode of Nerdist News Edition, senior news producer Jesse B. Gill and I put our heads together to reveal who is going to die in Avengers: Infinity War.
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Captain America – 100%
Let’s start with the guy that we all pretty much know is dead meat. In his mustache-tacular interview with The New York Times, Chris Evans revealed that after the still-untitled Avengers 4, he is going to hang up the shield and will officially retire from playing Captain America. Now that detail of Steve Rogers appearing in Avengers 4 might make you think that he’s going to survive, but we have a distinct feeling that Cap is going to shuffle off this mortal coil when he goes toe-to-toe with Thanos in Infinity War. It’ll probably be a nice recreation of this scene from the comics.
As for the Captain America we see in Avengers 4, that will be due to surviving Avengers traveling back in time to confer with a past version of Cap or it will be a digital recreation from Tony Stark’s B.A.R.F. Box (which he debuted in Civil War). One thing’s for certain: Cap’s a goner.
Hawkeye – 100%
It’s not a great sign that Clint Barton is conspicuously absent from all of the Avengers: Infinity War marketing so far. Maybe the suits at Marvel don’t think we care about archery anymore. Or maybe it’s because his days are definitely numbered. Of course, this could be one of the reddest herrings of them all; there’s a chance that Hawkeye could fake his death in Infinity War and come back as Ronin, much like he did in the comics, which would be the perfect way to make Hawkeye the next Agent Coulson.
Loki – 99%
Losing Marvel’s best villain is going to hurt, but you’d better brace yourself because it’s almost assuredly going to happen. Loki (Tom Hiddleston) has something that Thanos wants: the Tesseract, which contains the Space Stone. However, even that probably won’t save him from Thanos or the Black Order, who will lie, cheat, steal, and murder to get those cosmic mancala beads. While Loki may break bad at first, we think that coming into contact with Thanos and getting the full breadth of his sinister plan is going to give Marvel a way to give Hiddles McGriddles a graceful exit. And what better way to end Loki’s saga than hving him die while doing something somewhat noble and saying something unnecessarily cutting to Thor in the process?
Nebula – 85%
The Guardians of the Galaxy are going to be major players in Infinity War, and none of them have more beef with Thanos than their newest ally, Nebula. After showing off a slightly more heroic side in Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2, Nebula could go out in a blaze of antiheroic glory as she tries to take glorious vengeance on the worst dad in the universe. After all, we know from the Infinity Gauntlet mini-series that she looks great wearing a golden glove.
The Vision – 75%
The evidence for the Vision biting the bullet is pretty compelling considering that the Mind Stone is basically his forehead, and he seemingly needs that to, you know, live. And Thanos rips it out. It’s right there in the trailer. Now, this could be a fake-out and maybe they’ll take the Vision to Wakanda so Shuri can figure out a way to save the synthezoid’s life, but it’s gonna take an awful lot of paprikash to recover from Thanos-induced injuries.
Gamora – 75%
The Guardians’ resident sword-wielding badass also has her fair share of daddy issues that could lead to her doing something reckless and deadly, especially after her sister gets killed. Gamora wouldn’t go down without a fight, but she seems like a strong candidate to go down swinging against Marvel’s Mad Titan.
Drax the Destroyer – 75%
And speaking of reckless and deadly, Drax the Destroyer stands a pretty decent chance of dying during his mission to take vengeance on Thanos. To defeat Thanos, our heroes are going to have to be smart. They’re going to have to carefully plot out their attack if they hope to survive this battle. So basically, the exact opposite of how Drax operates.
War Machine – 60%
After his brutal injury in Captain America: Civil War, killing War Machine might seem cruel and unusual, but let’s be honest — he is one of the most expendable Avengers on the roster. Heck, they’ve already replaced him once in the MCU. Plus, Tony keeps upgrading his own armor and never offers to share with Rhodey. I thought you guys were friends, Tony Stank!
Falcon – 40%
Falcon’s death would undoubtedly be a devastating blow to the team. Who would look after poor Redwing? That being said, Sam Wilson has exponentially higher odds of becoming the next Captain America compared to dying at Thanos’ hands.
Star-Lord – 40%
While he might seem untouchable, Star-Lord is way likelier to die than you might expect. Now, I know what you’re thinking. Who? Peter Quill is our sleeper pick for sleeping with the fishes because of a clue on the Infinity War poster. Why is Chris Pratt billed last? Maybe because he gets…murdered…and thus doesn’t get a lot of screen time. Sure, there’s at least one more Guardians movie coming out, but considering that they’ve already killed Groot and Yondu…why not Star-Lord too?
Scarlet Witch – 40%
Unlike her brother, Scarlet Witch stands a great chance of making it out of this movie in one piece. With her powerful magic powers, she will likely prove instrumental in Avengers 4 in helping the survivors undo all the damage done in Infinity War. Plus, she’ll have to mourn the loss of Vision. And what do you do when you lose your Vision? You raise your glasses! Get it? Okay, I’m sorry.
Iron Man – 25%
Iron Man is almost definitely going to survive Infinity War, and he’ll probably feel pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty bad that Cap doesn’t. He has to lead the way in Avengers 4 and find some sort of redemption in the face of his allies’ deaths, and then maybe he can die. Or he can retire. Or have a buddy movie with Elon Musk. I mean, what else does Tony really have left to accomplish, anyway?
Black Widow – 25%
Although Black Widow is always putting herself in potentially deadly situations, she has a new solo movie in the works that will in no way be anything like Red Sparrow, so we think she’ll make it through Infinity War intact. If not, there’s always Lucy 2?
Spider-Man – 25%
Spider-Man is Marvel’s newly reacquired, motor-mouthed moneymaker, and after the success of Spider-Man: Homecoming, Peter Parker is safe until there is another sequel or two at least. However, if he did get Uncle Ben’d, we already know that Miles Morales exists in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, so we’d have a new web-slinger ready to go.
Doctor Strange – 25%
Doctor Strange is gonna…be just fine. Think about it: Brandywine Scootersnatch is just getting started in the MCU and he has way too many movies left on his presumed six-movie contract to die now. The same goes for Wong.
Hulk – 15%
I mean, come on. Thanos can’t kill Hulk. Hulk can’t even kill Hulk.
Rocket Raccoon and Mantis – 15%
Rocket Raccoon and Mantis are pretty safe because killing either of them would lack the emotional impact of offing some of the bigger players. They might get grievously wounded, for sure, but something tells me they will be a-okay.
Groot – 0%
Groot won’t die…because Groot is already dead. James Gunn confirmed it! Baby Groot is now Teen Groot, and I guess that Thanos could kill him too, but then we’d be right back to Baby Groot. Then again, maybe this should happen because Baby Groot is objectively, the best Groot
The Winter Soldier – 0%
Come on, guys, Bucky can’t die! Because he’s actually going to become the next Captain America. No, seriously, he told us so himself.
Thor – 0%
Everyone’s favorite shirtless Asgardian isn’t shuffling off this mortal coil anytime soon. Marvel finally figured out how to make a rad Thor movie with Ragnarok, and they’re gonna make more, so Thor will survive.
Ant-Man – 0%
Speaking of more Marvel movies, Ant-Man has a film coming out in July, so something tells me he’s safe keeping secrets from Baskin-Robbins in the meantime.
Black Panther – 0%
We can think of roughly 1.2 billion reasons why Black Panther has a zero percent chance of death. His solo movie is the most successful superhero movie in U.S. history; there’s no way Marvel is letting Thanos do anything to their newly minted cash cat. Now we just hope he doesn’t freeze when it really counts.
Thanos – 0%
Last and definitely the least chance of dying is that giant purple meanie himself, Thanos. There is zero chance he’ll be dead by the end of Infinity War because the Avengers are going to need a whole other movie to figure out a way to defeat him.
And there you have it, true believers! Do you agree with our statistics? Who do you think will bite it in Infinity War? Let us know in the comments below!
Images: Disney/Marvel Studios
Additional reporting by Jesse B. Gill.
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