Design an RPG that’s infinitely customizable. Build a virtual world seemingly without boundaries. Make a sandbox players can do anything they want in. The results have been unexpected, to say the least. Because even if those are the goals/hopes of game developers, it’s still unlikely that Bethesda ever expected an adventure with such strong themes of responsibility to emerge in what’s essentially the margins of Skyrim.
Which is to say that Patrick Lenton, author of a Man Entirely Made of Bats, was so consumed by the moral quandary of a certain side-quest that he pursued it to its most extreme end. And naturally, he Tweeted every step of the journey. The saga begins simply. Many Skyrim are surely familiar with the plight of the orphaned dog, Meeko.
worst part of Skyrim was when I found that dog whose owner died in a cabin, and then I of course had to adopt the dog bc i’m not a monster
— Patrick Lenton (@PatrickLenton) April 5, 2016
As conveyed by several dozen subsequent tweets, that opener led to many treacherous zigzags before Lenton reached the terse end point below. Think of them like stanzas in an epic poem. Turns out, even virtual pets are a huge burden. First, Lenton had to protect his reckless new dog from dragons and bandits. Then, he had to put major quests aside to build a house for it. Then, he needed to adopt a child to take care of the dog. But to do that, he needed a wife, so he then needed to court one, which brought on added domestic drama. And so on, and so on, in the endlessly-unfurling fashion that only an open-ended game like Skyrim can enable.
@PatrickLenton i know that my dog is safe. THE END. THANK YOU — Patrick Lenton (@PatrickLenton) April 5, 2016
No true saga is complete without an epilogue, of course, and Lenton’s post-script angles this whole affair in terms all-too-relatable to any blogger. Or honestly, anybody who’s gone on long internet “tangents” while they could’ve done something a bit more constructive.
@annaspargoryan i can’t believe I wrote this instead of that article that will earn me money which is due today
— Patrick Lenton (@PatrickLenton) April 5, 2016
Not since John Wick has one dog caused such turmoil! What are your tensest Skyrim experiences? Have you turned a cold shoulder to Meeko yourself? Hit the talkback!
Featured Image Credit: Bethesda