People always take cheap shots at “ gamers.” But jabs about “loners who never leave their home” are lazy and uninformed. They’re also hypocritical. Generations of us grew up obsessed with Nintendo, Sega, X-Box, and PlayStation. It wasn’t that long ago we were playing Smash Bros. or Mario Kart all night instead of studying. Plenty of us dedicated huge chunks of our lives to Golden Eye and Mortal Kombat. And a lot of the games and consoles we spent all those hours on weren’t exactly the greatest pieces of art or hardware ever created. But today some games are revelations, offering cinematic quality visuals and stories. That’s why we respect what it means to be a “gamer” and would never insult our fellow brethren. But that’s also why we’re allowed to say this: this fancy “gamer bed” set-up is both amazing and ridiculous.
If you, or a loved one you don’t see very often, would like to maximize your comfort while logging some serious hours on your favorite console, Japan’s Bauhutte has something we never even considered. The gaming furniture company (which we learned about at Kotaku) has made it possible to only leave your gaming-station when nature calls. It sells a collection that forms something a rich kid villain in a ’90s movie would have owned. Meet the ultimate (and possibly only?) in gaming-bed needs. And we do mean “ultimate,” because this is insane.
There are two logical reactions to see this. The most common, typically from the non-gaming community, will be shock. Just how many hours, days, weeks, months, and years would you need to spend playing video games to make this something you’d want, let alone something you’d need?
The second reaction though comes from a much smaller group, the exact people this is meant for. That reaction is pure, unadulterated desire. If you fall into this latter group you’ll need to order multiple pieces to create your own gaming-bed dream. That will include Bauhutte’s bedside table, it’s bed desk, bed sideboard, and plenty of other accessories and furniture to hold your games and consoles. You might also want to invest in some pillows, a mattress, and blankets in case you want to actually be comfortable or ever get some sleep. The glow from your monitors won’t exactly keep you warm at night.
If you hope to keep your bedside shelves full of soda and snacks you might also want to invest in one of those creepy Google home electronic keys. That way you can have groceries delivered right to your bed without having to get up. Unfortunately you might have to interact with another live human then, so make sure you order in bulk.
Aaaand we just fell into the same trap we chided others for. We’re taking lame potshots at gamers. And for what? Because someone wants to sell them a bed we’d have loved to have ourselves not that long ago? We’re sorry. We should know better. That was lazy. Not quite as lazy as a literal bed dedicated to gaming, but pretty close.
C’mon! Even hardcore gamers, which we once were, can admit this thing might be amazing, but it’s also ridiculous.
Featured Image: Bauhutte