Movies

FACE/OFF is Being Remade and the Internet Has Some Thoughts

by Rosie Knight
Sep 10 2019 • 12:08 PM

Let’s start this whole thing by stating that John Woo’s 1997 masterpiece Face/Off is perfect and doesn’t need a remake. But it’s Hollywood in 2019, so that means that it’s getting one. After Paramount made the announcement yesterday, the internet was ablaze with suggestions for the new flick ranging from the serious to the confused, the strange to the WTF. Naturally, we’ve collected some of the best ones for you right here.

Though it’s hard to imagine who might be able to top Travolta and Cage in a Face/Off, we’d actually love to see Samara Weaving and Vanessa Kirby terrorizing each other and chewing scenery, but they’d also have to bring back John Woo. It’s non-negotiable.

This is another bit of inspired casting as both of these actors have proved they give weird, scary, and wonderful performances which are exactly what made Face/Off so damn special all those years ago.

Timo Tjahjanto is one of the most exciting horror directors out there (you might have seen his work in The Night Comes For Us, or the V/H/S series) and we’re very into his Clive Barker take on Face/Off, which sadly will never see the light of day.

I mean, I know we said that we didn’t want a Face/Off reboot but maybe if Sarah Paulson and Catherine Zeta-Jones are involved, we actually really, really, do…

Contemporary Travolta and Nic Cage seem to be the most simple yet unlikely version of this film and to be honest, we would actually love to see it. Especially if it was framed as a shot for shot remake and not a sequel. High/Concept.

This is just a really good idea.

Most fans were immediately very invested in the idea of having two people who look almost exactly the same play the roles. Which begs the question: What would be the point of taking their Faces… Off?

Matt Bomer and Henry Cavill are basically the same person but I guess this would basically make Face/Off a Negative Man vs. Superman movie, which is actually pretty cool.

This is actually very good casting because both of these actresses are great… but, again, the point of Face/Off is not that they look the same. In fact, that would make the entire core conceit completely pointless!

Discovering an interesting trend here which is that a lot of actors who look the same are actually quite good picks. After killing it in Upgrade and The Invitation it would be nice to see Logan Marshall-Green get a big blockbuster flick. Also, this would be another secret superhero movie as Venom switches faces with The Shocker!

Samara Weaving making a second appearance here as someone gets the joke and it basically makes the movie Persona but with some doves, lots of guns, and maybe a choir.

This seems serious but again defeats the point. Still, Keira Knightly and Natalie Portman would kill it so why the heck not?

This is like the sweetest most sit-com friendly version, something more along the lines of Face/Swap. It’s a comedy about dads.

Aren’t they just the same guy???

Do you have better ideas about who should star in Face/Off? Just want John Woo back? Scared that the Sonic The Hedgehog writers are in charge? Hit us up and let us know!

Featured Image: Paramount Pictures