If you’ve been watching Game the Game on our Twitch channel, you’ve heard Becca and Ivan speak the names of a few of the Snack Gods, but who are they? What do they want from you? And what do they want from each other?
Azaque: God of the Barbecue
Also known as: Father of the Gods, King of the Grill
As the Father of the Gods, Azaque hosts the gatherings of the gods. He spends his time with Huuzeer by the grill, making the perfect steak with a beer in his hand and leaving his wife, Rachotep, to make sure the party goes off without a hitch. He keeps the other gods in their place and tending their roles.
Rachotep: Goddess of Hosting
Also known as: Enforcer of Manners, Socialite
Rachotep rises to the challenge of any party, always setting the perfect table. She leaves Azaque to the grill because she knows people will remember her contributions more. Her ire is raised by bad manners, not rsvp-ing, and arriving late. She throws coasters like throwing stars at offenders.
Ushnux: God of Sweets
Also known as: The Bringer of Sweets, The Decayer of Teeth
Everyone’s favorite god, Ushnux is as sweet as pie (and would love it if you had a slice of pie). He makes sure dentists stay in business and is up for anything, so long as it’s sweet.
Also known as: The Tasty One, The Filling God
On the other side of the coin, Sizzlork is as tough as Ushnux is sweet. She is all about experiencing life and getting the most out of everything.
Huuzeer: God of Libations
Also known as: Master of Ill Choices, Lubricator of Social Affairs
Always the life of the party, Huuzeer is laid back unless there is a keg in need of being tapped. He is the first one to do a keg stand and can be found mixing drinks behind the bar (and having a few sips for himself). If you want to invoke him, just say, “Watch this. Hold my beer.”
Also known as: Our Green Lady, The Untouched
Avatar: Veggie Tray
Bistoe is the most overlooked of all the gods. She can be found in the corner, arguing with her sister, Bana-ra.
Bana-ra: Goddess of Fruit
Also known as: Mistress of the Melons
Bana-ra is just a step or two above her sister in the hierarchy of gods. People don’t go out of their way to avoid her offerings, but neither do they go for it first. There is an ongoing argument between Bana-ra and Bistoe over who gets the tomato.
Also known as: The Yeast Master
Carbonella is the daughter of Ushnux and Sizzlork. She was conceived during the Festival of Great Repute (the most successful of Rachotep’s parties). She is purported to rise to heights unseen by either of her parents and even holds sway with Huuzeer.
Diptune: God of Dips
Also known as: Chip Master
Diptune can be warm or cold, depending on what the situation calls for. He’s good friends with Carbonella and Tog’itii.
Tog’itii: God of Spices
Also known as: The Hot One, Flavorful
Avatar: Jalapeno Pepper
Tog’itii knows life would be bland without him. He’s constantly trying out new mixes and blends to keep you guessing.
Bynar: God of Fried Foods
Also known as: The Versatile One
Avatar: Fried Oreo
Bynar gets along with everyone, because you can fry anything (even beer). His reach is universal which makes him chafe at his minor status. One day, he hopes to be elevated to the ranks of major deity.
Also known as: The Chocolate One
Avatar: Chocolate Bunny
Nyadon is the smallest of the gods. She is as sweet as Ushnux, but has a core of strength that keeps her from being trampled by the other gods. They may still make pocket size jokes, but it is done in a loving way.
Vishnaarl: Goddess of Food on a Stick
Also known as: The Portable One
Vishnaarl is everyone’s favorite god when they go to fairs. She believes that everything is better if you can walk around while eating it. She loves finding a way to make food portable for the masses.
There have been whispers of other gods in the pantheon and those of the under-pantheon, evil gods of hangovers and food poisoning. They shall not be named at this time for to do so will give them more sway on the world.
Do you have a favorite Snack God? Is there a snack that you feel deserves its own God? Drop me a comment below or show off your art skills with your interpretation of the Pantheon!
Image Credit: @TabletopOwlbear