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San Francisco Supernerd Brings City To Its Knees

…is the headline I’m sure SF city programmer Terry Childs wanted to see when he locked everyone out and hoarded the passwords of the city’s network. As you can imagine, the information contained therein is, to say the least, sensitive: payroll data, law enforcement records, officials’ email addresses, Gavin Newsom’s private rolodex of married sluts, and SF’s plan to attract even more homeless and compete them in a Bumlympics. My favorite part of the story so far is Childs’ defense which hinges on the idea that his superiors concocted a frame-job because they “resented his abilities”—a textbook nerd delusion.

When are these weenie city-worker hackers going to realize that real terrorist hackers are young and striking, like Timothy Olyphant in Die Hard 4: Live Free or Die Hard, have millions of dollars at their disposal and attack the city in mobile computing units until they make the mistake of not figuring on a rogue cop like John McClain who thinks outside the box and makes his own rules?

See the full story at The San Francisco Chronicle.

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Comments

  1. Kerry says:

    i thought the Bumlympics had been renamed the Hobolympics after the Bum population decided “Bum” wasn’t a catchy and old-timey enough descriptor of their social status?

    i’m going to write-in Gavin Newsom’s hair for president.

  2. Sally says:

    Die Hard 3 is Die Hard With A Vengeance.
    Thank you for allowing me my moment of know-it-allism. It won’t happen again.