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GILMORE GIRLS: Supercaffeinated Recaps, Part 14: Breakups Galore

GILMORE GIRLS: Supercaffeinated Recaps, Part 14: Breakups Galore

We’ve come to the fifth season of Gilmore Girls in our supercaffeinated recaps. How many cups of coffee have you consumed on your rewatch? I stopped counting because the number was getting past what I wanted to track. I may not be on Lorelai or Rory levels, but I really like coffee, a.k.a. the drink that gives me life.

But back to our girls! It’s a tumultuous time for Rory. It’s like she’s making up for teens. Or maybe not–maybe this exploring is what the average kid does in college. The road is rocky for Emily, too. In fact, Emily and Rory are off track while Lorelai’s stable in work and with her personal life. Has this happened before? Let’s discuss mid-season five highlights.

Put a Tiara On It

Oh, Richard and Emily. When they found out Rory was dating Dean again, they put their estrangement aside in order to do a typical Richard and Emily thing in “The Party’s Over.” The fact that it was expected didn’t make it any less gross. They threw a party for their Yale alumni friends, but it was actually a shindig to put Rory in the same room with a whole bunch of Yale bachelors. Emily conveniently had a hairdresser and fancy jewelry ready for her. Ugh.

The most obnoxious part about it is the deception involved. Rory has been sweet and kind to her grandparents, why do they have to play dumb about their intentions? Their willingness to lie and manipulate is among Richard and Emily’s worse traits.

Logan and his pals Finn and Colin were at the party and started a sub-party to cheer Rory up. As we’ve often seen with the youngest Gilmore, she slipped comfortably into the upscale setting. It all went to hell when Dean showed up to get her, threw a quiet temper tantrum, and dumped her–which, let’s be honest, is for the best anyway.

Favorite quote: “If it flew, swam, or crawled on this earth, we just ate it.” – Lorelai

Any Excuse for a Party

Richard and Emily’s separation didn’t last long. In “Wedding Bell Blues,” the 100th episode of Gilmore Girls, they renewed their vows. Maybe I’m cynical, but I saw this as an excuse for Emily to throw a lavish, expensive party. And if so, I don’t criticize her for it.

Meddling with Rory’s love life proved to be successful, and Emily must have been encouraged by the results. When Emily realized Lorelai’s relationship with Luke was on a more serious level than she thought, she took extreme action. Extreme, horrible action. Emily went to Christopher with an invite to her renewals and in not so many words, told him to steal Lorelai away from Luke.

What. The. Hell. Emily.

Emily Gilmore has been responsible for a laundry list of misguided, mean things, but this was over the top. Christopher deserves ire as well. He shouldn’t have taken advice from Emily, no matter how much he wanted to be with Lorelai. Why would he want to ruin her happiness? Even typing about this episode makes me livid!

Favorite quote: “When a woman has a crack baby, you do not buy her a puppy!” – Emily

Feeding Frank

Are you happy, Emily? The Christopher fiasco was too much for Luke to process, so he broke up with Lorelai. Luke handled the situation poorly. He was attacked and put in the awkwardest of situations, but he reacted so terribly–this was the guy who told Lorelai he was all in. Way to be a dick, Luke.

Then again, maybe Lorelai shouldn’t have pushed. Luke could have at least given her a time frame to help her, but not knowing when he might be done thinking meant she just wanted to fix it. I’ve been there. I bet a few of you have, too. Regardless of who did what and who’s to blame (it’s Emily), we can all agree break-ups suck.

Luke and Lorelai’s split was particularly painful, though. They’d only been together for three quarters of a season, and we’ve never seen Lorelai this utterly wrecked. I see it as a sign of her love for Luke because she didn’t fall apart over Max or anyone else in this way. Her sadness meant Rory stepped in to play the parent, and she was the support Lorelai needed. Logan helped, too; his actions gave Rory one more mark to put in the “pro Logan” column in her head and it did the same for the audience.

Favorite quote: “I am not that girl. I am not the one who cries and falls apart and calls her ex-boyfriend to come and save her.”

Before you go, catch up on all we know about Netflix’s Gilmore Girls revival.

Have hit your favorite episode of Gilmore Girls yet? Tell me about it in the comments.

Images: Warner Bros., Alexis Bledels, Aditi, JssMariano/Tumblr

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