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What if GAME OF THRONES Was Written by Different Famous Authors?

Here’s the thing about basing your television show on source material: you run into some big time problems when the source material runs out. So, while we A Song of Ice and Fire fans might be frustrated that George RR Martin hasn’t finished the next book in the series, The Winds of Winter, in a reasonable time period (or, hell, even a reasonably unreasonable time period), at least Game of Thrones has opted to continue on on its own.

So what do you do when your very creative author hasn’t created anything new in a very long time? You go find an experienced writer that can get the job done. You find someone willing and able and eager to bring their vision to the masses. That’s exactly the route we took in the above video—scouring the literary world for the most talented novelists out there to bring Martin’s stories back to life… though, perhaps, with a different voice.

Westeros is full of magic, and a (potential) main hero that can come back from the dead to save the day. So why not try another fantasy author with a huge, successful franchise of her own, with books that incorporated all of those same elements? Just hope she doesn’t love her own characters so much she that can’t seem to let them go. Of course, if that doesn’t work, you can try out someone that knows how to really find the love in any situation—someone that can help make the land where “all men must die” into a place where all men find true happiness. So long as you’re careful that the show doesn’t become a little… schmaltzy.

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There’s always the big picture to worry about, too. Considering after just 10 episodes they’ll be back to needing more source material again, you can also think ahead by hiring an author that writes faster than any other novelist alive. Plus that guy can help capture the true horror of living in Westeros. Like, all the horror. Like, way too much horror. But remember, the only thing Game of Thrones seems to like more than death is its sexual content. So who knows how to write about sex for a large audience better than anyone else? She can work, just as long as you don’t care about dialogue, or a plot, or being able to watch it with anyone else in the room.

Screw it! You want someone that knows how to create a massive, unique, amazing world? A world as beloved as the one Martin has created? Then you replace one George with another. (Just don’t let him do any prequels to Game of Thrones and everything should work out just fine.)

So what author would you hire to finish crafting the story for Game of Thrones? Write your best (and by that we mean funniest) suggestions in the comments section below. But then, like, rewrite them a couple of times so we have plenty of options. You can see how these things can go poorly.

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