Please note: this post contains spoilers for season six of Game of Thrones. Do not read on if you aren’t caught up and don’t want to know anything about what may or may not happen in this year’s finale!
The Seven have been smiling upon the citizens of Westeros lately. With an uncharacteristically low death toll this season for all seven kingdoms (give or take a random Ramsay, Rickon, or Wun Wun), the idea that “All Men Must Die” feels like an ominous foretelling of what’s to come. Which means we may be in for a major murder-fest just around the King’s Landing corner. Our nerd money says that a few of our favorite Thrones‘ characters will definitely die before the season six finale. But who are we already painting eye-stones for? We’ve got the odds right here on Nerdist News!
Before we begin, let’s review the characters we know aren’t going to die (right, George??). Game of Thrones might start to get a little predictable if Jon Snow dies at the end of every season, so we feel pretty confident that the former Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch will continue to enjoy his second life well into season seven. Dany should also be OK, since we don’t think anyone over in Meereen is quite ready to take over her Dragon reins.
As for everyone else; its open season on all kings, commoners, and High Sparrows alike! Our death watch starts with that Pimpin’ Imp, Tyrion. The youngest Lannister has made an uncharacteristic number of mistakes this season. Maybe he’s still adjusting to that Narrow Sea jet lag, but… it’s highly unlikely (sorry for totally ignoring your lesson on Dwarf jokes last week) but we just like covering our bases. Likelihood: 1 out of 10 dead Direwolves.
Up next, it’s the Golden Boy of King’s Landing, the Unclefather himself, Jaime Lannister. Unlikely, but the last few seasons have been all about all about crapping on Cersei, so it’s not impossible. After losing two of her kids and enduring an intense public shaming, we can’t imagine anything could bring The Dowager Queen any lower… except maybe, saying goodbye to her favorite Brotherlover. That’s why we’re giving the Kingslayer 2 out of 10 Dead Direwolves.
In the books, Brienne of Tarth has a pretty big target on her back, courtesy of Lady Stoneheart. But since that storyline looks like it’s not getting brought to life anytime soon, we’re pretty sure Brienne is just fine. Things could get bad for her if she tries to put the breaks on Littlefinger’s Sansa Seduction 2.0, but we can’t see a battle between those two going in the Master of Coin’s favor. 3 out of 10 Dead Direwolves.
Now, Cersei Lannister on the other hand. She’s desperate to reclaim any scrap of any of her former, Queenly glory and there’s a huge cache of Wildfire under The Sept of Baelor that may just help her do that. Is Ceresi crazy enough to blow up a few square blocks of King’s Landing just to take out a few of her barefoot enemies? Totally! Will she get caught in the crossfire? That we’re not so sure about. 3.5 out of 10 Dead Direwolves.
Last week, Sansa finally got her major empowerment moment at the end of “Battle of the Bastards.” The GoT showrunners would never build up a character to such awesome heights just to rip her way from us in the next episode—Oh wait… this is Game of Thrones, that is exactly what they would do! Obviously Littlefinger is going to take Sansa’s rejection badly. Just how badly, we can’t say. Let’s just say we’re glad her castle doesn’t have access to any Moon Doors. 6 out of 10 Direwolves. Sorry Sansa!
Obviously Cersei has some much bigger, barefoot fish to fry at her trial. The High Sparrow and his Faith Militant have been the main cause for the downfall over the last two seasons. But Ceresi would never miss an opportunity to take out an enemy, which is why Margaery Tyrell could also be in the line of Wildfire. Sorry Margie, 8 out of 10 Direwolves.
Which brings us to our number one pick for the Fire and Ice Firing Squad… drumroll please for the Young King Tommen! Sorry Tom Tom, the dramatic irony is just too sweet to ignore and Cersei Lannister murdering her last living child in her quest for power is exactly the kind of gut punch of an ending Game of Thrones loves to deliver in its final moments. So long King Tommen, 10 out of 10 Direwolves! (But let us know if you need anyone to adopt Ser Pounce once you’re gone. Nerdist could use an office cat.)