Editor’s Note: This post contains spoilers for Fox’s Scream Queens. Proceed with caution if you have not watched the latest episode yet.
Scream Queens is back and in full, violent swing, everybody. Last week, we caught up with the Chanels, jumped into the new hospital setting, and witnessed the birth of a serial killer. Dean Munsch is back and the new owner of the facilit, and Zayday is suspicious of her intentions. During last night’s episode, “Warts and All,” Zayday and Chamberlain (the Candy Striper) set out to get to the bottom of the Dean’s plan and discover the history of the hospital. Several familiar faces also made a hilarious return. We learned a lot, so let’s get right to it.
At the end of the premiere, Chanel No. 5, along with the werewolf girl at the center of last week’s episode, were at the mercy of the Green Meanie. Of course, No. 5 survived the cliffhanger and was left to deal with the slimy aftermath. As per usual, nobody believed No. 5’s story, with Chanel and No. 3 saying she probably planned the murder to get attention and sabotage their dates with Doctor Holt (John Stamos) and Doctor Cascade (Taylor Lautner).
Down and out, No. 5 reached out to the patient of the week, Tyler (guest star, Colton Haynes) for some comfort. If you couldn’t tell by the image at the top of the page, Tyler’s in for treatment for his seriously gnarly warts. Luckily, No. 5 is willing to look past his skin issue and raise money for treatment. Sure, she’s mostly doing it because he was pretty attractive before the disease hit. Whatever the case, I’m okay with it because it resulted in a hilarious spoof of those sad Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercials. Plus, both No. 5 and her new beau were able to set aside his looks and focus on their blossoming love. Too bad he died at the end of the episode. Poor No. 5 just can’t win.
But Tyler isn’t the only new patient; Chad Radwell (Glen Powell) also returned and brought along his friend Randall. To be perfectly honest, Randall doesn’t really matter. It was fun to watch him worry about death by constant screaming, and freak out after every tiny sound, but the real draw here was obviously the return of Chad. So good job, Randall. You played your part and brought Chanel’s ditzy ex-boyfriend into the picture.
The only person not glad about Chad’s return is Doctor Holt. After Stamos’ steamy shower scene in the season premiere, it was only a matter of time before Chanel sunk her teeth into him and claimed him for her own. They went on a date at the beginning of the episode and things seemed to be going well, until Chad showed up in a red devil costume to freak Chanel out. Now, think back to the very end of the first season. Remember the red devil standing over Chanel’s bed in the psychiatric hospital? That was apparently Chad screwing with her. But now he’s back and ready to fight for her heart, even if it means going head-to-head with Holt in a heated squash tourney to win her heart.
While sniffing out his competition, Chad discovered that Holt’s transplanted hand actually belonged to a notorious serial killer (who was also pretty adept at playing squash). Seeing the duo fight for Chanel’s heart has already been pretty entertaining, so I hope it continues. It’s unclear whether Holt is involved in the murders, but something about his threats and obvious ties to a serial killer make him suspicious. Considering how great the show is at faking fans out, however, I doubt that is what’s going to end up happening.
For now, Zayday and the girls are focused at the task at hand: finding out why their former Dean invited them to the hospital. After a bit of digging, Zayday and Chamberlain learned that the hospital’s entire staff was murdered at a Halloween party in the ’80s. When the duo confronted Dean Munsch with their findings, the former Dean broke down and told them the real reason she started the hospital. In short: she is suffering from a disease called Kuru (from accidental cannibalism), and hopes the staff will be able to find a cure.
But it’s going to be difficult with another masked murderer on the loose. Munsch tangoed with the Green Meanie this week and almost unmasked him/her before being disturbed by Chanel No. 3 and Doctor Cassidy. Afraid, the girls reached out to the only person they knew: special FBI agent, Denise Hemphill (Niecy Nash). It’s sure good to see Nash in all her hilarious glory. As part of the investigation, she took the group to see another familiar face. Yep, Lea Michele’s Hester made a big return last night, and if she gets her way, she’ll be swimming in fancy beauty products and living as a resident of the hospital soon. All she needs to do is tell the group what she knows about the Green Meanie.
Who do you think The Green Meanie is? Are you glad to see Chad, Denise, and Hester? Let us know in the comments below!