These New Reebok ALIENS Sneakers Will Inevitably Bankrupt Me

“Game over, man, game over!”

While Bill Paxton’s Private Hudson first uttered this indelible line in 1986’s Aliens, it is also what I said aloud to my bank account on Wednesday when Reebok unveiled their new line of Alien Stomper shoes in support of  Alien Day. The now-annual holiday falls on April 26 as a cheeky homage to LV-426, the Xenomorph-filled planet on which Sigourney Weaver’s Ellen Ripley and the crew of the Nostromo made a horrifying first contact in 1979’s Alien. This year, Reebok announced a dynamic duo of high-end, collectible sneakers entitled the “Final Battle” pack, which pays tribute to the iconic showdown between the Alien Queen and a Powerloader-suited Ripley in Aliens.

Unlike the crew members that Ripley keeps finding herself saddled with, Reebok has learned from past mistakes. Last year’s Alien-themed sneaker release was inadvertently marketed as  only being available in men’s sizes, which seemed particularly boneheaded given that they were a replica of something worn by one of the most celebrated on-screen heroines in genre film.

This year’s Aliens sneaker release is thankfully available in unisex sizing, and will be available for purchase on July 18. The “Final Battle” pack will retail for $325 and consists of two pairs of shoes, the “Queen” Alien Stomper and the “Powerloader” Alien Stomper. While that price may seem steep to the casual consumer, collectors with a slight sneaker addiction like yours truly can’t believe that they’re packaging them together when they could easily charge the same amount for each individual pair. But that’d be a real Weyland-Yutani-ass move.

The “Queen” Alien Stomper is inspired by the Alien Queen (duh) and comes in a black patent leather meant to evoke the xenomorphs’ iconic exoskeletons. They also feature a “toxic green” midsole that echoes the xenomorphs’ acidic blood, and have a forefoot strap embroidered with “XX121,” the canonical designation code for the alien species.

The “Powerloader” Alien Stomper” is a seriously sweet reimagining of Ripley’s black-and-yellow cargo suit, which she used to kick all types of alien ass. With an “icy orange” outsole, the “safety yellow” shoes feature all manner of tiny details, including “PWL” heel graphics, red arrows referencing the suit’s hydraulic movement, the suit’s P-5000 serial number, and a mesh panel over the Reebok logo meant to represent the Powerloader’s protective canopy.

The special edition sneakers also come in a collectible box, which is laden with all manner of Alien iconography.

To celebrate the release, Reebok put together a claymation parody of Aliens climactic showdown:

Now here’s hoping that I can actually get my greasy mitts on these shoes this July without having to shriek “Get away from her, you bitch!” at the nearest customer.

What do you think of these Aliens-inspired shoes? Have you checked out the rest of the images in the gallery below? Let us know in the comments.

Image: Reebok

Dan Casey is the senior editor of Nerdist and the author of books about Star Wars and the Avengers. Follow him on Twitter ( @Osteoferocious).

How acidic is a Xenomorph’s blood according to science?

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