Movieline has a post reacting to the news that someone’s remaking Logan’s Run with Ryan Gosling by making a list of 50 movies that should never be remade. The criterion they use is that the movies have to be susceptible to a remake — that is, it has to be plausible that someone in Hollywood could buy the rights and try to do it. The problem is that I don’t think there’s a single movie that Hollywood WOULDN’T try to remake if someone saw a profit potential in it. Movieline’s Louis Virtel gives the example of Gone With The Wind as one that wouldn’t be remade, but I wouldn’t be so fast to assume that it’s sacrosanct. If they announced tomorrow that a remake of GWTW with Justin Bieber was on track for a Fall premiere, I wouldn’t be surprised. Appalled, sure, but not surprised.
The Movieline list includes movies I don’t think were all that great to begin with (Grease? Bullets Over Broadway? Clue?!? Okay, those HAVE to be tongue-in-cheek) and movies that absolutely COULD be remade (You don’t think someone’s considered “updating” Rosemary’s Baby?), but some of them should be on a preservation list (Chinatown and Airplane! so perfectly did what they did that a remake isn’t even thinkable). And, really, in the right hands, you CAN remake most movies. The Coen Brothers did a pretty good job with True Grit (and, yes, I know, they say it’s not really a remake because they hewed closer to the book. Two movies, same story, same name, same characters, same source material… remake).
But you can make a better list. Nerdist readers come from a different perspective, and I imagine your do-not-touch list would include a lot of movies, especially in the sci-fi, fantasy, and horror genres, that might not occur to the Movieline fans. So make your nominations below. And I nominate Local Hero. Can’t do that better than it’s already been done.
Images: New Line Cinema, Dimension Films, Sony