Two of the, uh, “biggest” names in rap appear tonight on Adult Swim’s The Eric Andre Show, to go head-to-head in what will surely be remembered as one of the most masochistic rap battles in recent history. One half of Run The Jewels and Part-time barber, Killer Mike, and the Anthony Bourdain of hip-hop, Action Bronson, make a special appearance, facing off during the credits. But this isn’t your ordinary rap battle between two masters of the craft; both must freestyle while simultaneously running on parallel treadmills.
The heavy-hitting lyricists throw their weight (ugh, I know, I’m sorry; no more word play) into the task, but unfortunately can only muster a few “Yo’s” before channeling the remainder of their energy toward staving off a debilitating build-up of lactic acid. The sweatshirt was a poor choice, Action.
When the smoke clears from the battle field, the only casualties are the scattered remnants of a plate full of donuts, knocked from the hands of a cheeky production assistant. The end credits mercifully conclude the rappers’ misery. This rap battle will have to be declared a draw, but we hope one day to actually get these two opposite each other on a stage, sans treadmills.
What other rappers would you like to see go head-to-head in a precariously challenging rap battle? Maybe Rick Ross and Pitbull in a diving contest? How about Macklemore and Riff Raff while sumo wrestling? Share your ultimate rap battle in the comments below!