Because the final chapter always has to be the darkest, I guess, the full trailer for Peter Jackson’s The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies is replete with turmoil, struggle, and what could very likely spell the end of the Free Peoples of Middle-Earth. Except we know that won’t happen because prequels. Still, it’s looking pretty dire for everybody involved with the ever-maddening Dwarven King Thorin Oakenshield (Richard Armitage) becoming less and less reasonable while the armies of men and elves amass outside of Erebor’s gates. And then there are those pesky Orc armies that have been plaguing our heroes since they left The Shire, led by the one-armed knave Azog in all his motion-capture glory.
Enough chatter, let’s watch and then chatter afterward!
Definitely looks epic, but I feel like they’re really undercutting the cliffhanger from the last movie by showing us that He Who Is Death is defeated early on in the movie. In fact, this trailer contains zero images of Smaug and only a brief glimpse at his desolation. Soooo why were we a-scared of him last time? Is it cuz his teeth were like needles and and his claws were like very jagged rocks or whatever he said?
Besides the lack of Smaug, we do get to see plenty of escalating tensions and petty squabbling, plus some gaps get filled in that we probably didn’t need filling, like Saruman telling Elrond and Galadriel that he will handle Sauron… OF COURSE HE WILL. Bilbo, also not really in it that much, although to be fair, after he outsmarts Smaug he is mostly just an observer and commenter on the massive battle that’s to follow. Does anyone know who the fifth army is? We know Men, Orcs, Elves, and Dwarves… take a wild stab at who the fifth army is, given what we know about 11th hour finishes to Tolkien.
Anyway, aside from my griping about little things, this movie looks like it’ll at least be entertaining and big which is, I suppose, what we could hope for from a fantasy epic. The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies hits U.S. cinemas on December 12th.