He’s got a sweater and he’s not afraid to wear it, because they say it’s more relatable than a suit and tie. “He,” of course, is Nerdist-endorsed presidential candidate Marvin E. Quasniki, who released his latest fireside chat today (Tuesday). With a blanket on his lap and his faithful dog Buster napping at his side, he’s using his folksy manner and homespun wisdom to address the dreams of Americans, like home ownership (move into the abandoned shack at the edge of town), the future of our nation’s youth (just be glad, he says, they’re not zombies), and world peace (not gonna happen). The Quasniki vision is all about lowering the bar a little so you aren’t disappointed with how things turn out. Let’s see your Romneys and Santorums and Obamas give you straight talk like that.
By the way, Buster hasn’t moved in quite some time. Maybe someone should check up on him.