Note: This post contains spoilers for FX’s American Horror Story: Hotel. Read at your own risk.
After a two-week hiatus, American Horror Story: Hotel returned on Wednesday for its second to last episode. Though going on a short break right before the show is about to end is a bit odd, it gave us enough time to process the the events that occurred at the end of the previous episode, “She Gets Revenge.” To sum up, Iris and Liz Taylor arrived at the penthouse suite, guns-a-blazing, with the intention of taking down the Countess once and for all. This week’s episode “Battle Royale” dealt with the fallout of that decision, tied up some of the loose ends ahead of the finale, and featured an extra special American Horror Story cameo.
Though they were successful in wounding the Countess, Iris and Liz accidentally shot Donovan in the process. With his life slipping away, he used his dying breath to ask his mother to take him outside, to ensure that he didn’t kick the bucket in the hotel. Following his passing, Liz cremated him using the hotel furnace, and gave the ashes to Iris, who then proceeded to dump them out on the bed so that she could talk to her son one last time. As soon as she was done, she asked Ms. Evers to clear every last speck of him from the room, officially removing him from the Cortez just as he’d wished.
That out of her system, she regrouped with Liz to plan the next step. With the Countess still on the run, they decided that their best option was to let Ramona out. Little did they know, Ramona had already escaped her cage, and replenished herself with Will Drake and the crew of vampire children that John and Alex threw in with her during the previous episode. Despite giving her more energy, the young vamps also passed along the measles, which didn’t “sit right” with her. When Liz and Iris told her they needed her to kill the Countess, she told them she needed a fresh kill beforehand to cure her of the sickness.
Lucky for Ramona, a pretty powerful witch walked into the Cortez, just in the knick of time. We’ve seen our fair share of season crossovers in the history of AHS, but this cameo was hands down one of our favorites. Apparently after the events in Coven, Queenie decided to take a vacation in L.A., and appear on The Price is Right alongside Drew Carey; she had an enchanted ticket. Seizing the opportunity, Liz planted Ramona in Queenie’s room so that she could feed on her. But, since she’s a “human voodoo doll,” every wound she’s given ended up affecting Ramona. Amidst her frustration, March showed up and stabbed Queenie, telling the witch that her power didn’t work against ghosts.
However, the help came with a price. In exchange for his assistance, March told Ramona that he wanted her to kill the Countess, so that she’d never leave the hotel. Despite having several targets on her back, the Countess was rescued by Sally following the attack. We finally got a peek at the psychologically disturbed ghost’s background: Apparently, during her days as a drug dealer, Sally had come upon a pair of musicians who “treated her like an artist.” After checking in at the hotel to get high, she used her expert sewing skills to attach the couple to her. They ended up ODing (no thanks to Ms. Evers) while they were still connected. After being tethered to their dead bodies and tortured by a demon for a couple of days, she’d finally had enough and broke free.
Speaking of saving the Countess, after picking out the bullet fragments, Sally brought the injured lady of the house two of her children to feed on. She reluctantly obliged, and got strong enough to head back to the penthouse. Ramona showed up soon after, though the Countess ended up convincing Ramona to let her leave with her son. John was waiting for her with a loaded gun, however. Just when we thought his murderer ways were in his past, the Countess was his final 10 Commandments victim. Granted, he only did it because his family had been taken away from him. In order to get them back, Sally told him that he would have to complete March’s quest.
While John and March were admiring the completed trophy wall, Sally tried to kill him, because she wanted to keep him bound to the hotel. But March stopped her from doing so because he had more plans in mind for him. Much to March’s dismay however, John told him that he was done with his “plans” and just wanted his family back. Although we don’t know how things are going to work out yet, not all was bad for March, because the Countess was finally his forever.
What did you think of this week’s episode? What do you think is going to happen in the finale? Let us know in the comments below!