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80s. Glamrock. Xmas. Video.

Thanks to Jonah Ray, Paul Bonanno, Annie Hardy, Rob Huebel, Brendon Walsh, Dave Gibbs, Ambrielle Web, Eli Braden & adult entertainment megastar Dana DeArmond.

Another set of thanks hurled at AOTS EPs Vinny Rutherford and Joshua Brentano for giving us cash money and a great G4-ey crew.

Thanks also go out to the 1980s for existing solely so we could make fun of it.

And thanks to me. I thank myself. Yeah, I’m just that egocentric.

Final thanks go to YOU for watching!!! 30% more thanks if you pass it on but no gratitude penalties for not.

Update: Hilariously, people keep asking where I am in the video. I’m the one with long blond wig, cowboy hat and spandex singing into the microphone with balls on it. I know I should dress that way ALL of the time but I am too attached to my normal costume of a slightly too small ironic tshirt and fancy sneakers.


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  1. Dark Doom says:

    Ok Chris, you are forgiven for “Singled Out”. You are the king of 80’s hair metal. Good job duder…

  2. Arbor says:

    How could they not figure out that was you singing lead?! Just because Clark Kent wears glasses does not make him look any less like Superman.

  3. Baz says:

    *stands & applauds*

  4. InsertAwsomeUseerNameHere says:

    Is that a man-lady sing!!?

  5. just got around to watching this. awesome!

  6. M_pony says:

    Oh my god, it’s full of GEO-LOCK. Comcast can attempt to suck on my implausibly-large impossible-to-suck balls… and FAIL.. because they also suck at sucking.

    Seriously.. someone help a rest-of-the-goddamn-planet out here.


  7. todd says:

    cool homage to the 80’s hair metal. too bad people around the world can’t see this.

  8. Not bad Chris. I didn’t recognize you either until about a minute into the video. You just don’t look pretty enough in real life to be a glam rock singer, so I was confused and also a little disturbed to find out you were the hot one in the spandex. Now that I’ve washed my mind out with Ajax, I thought it was a great video and lots of fun to watch. My friend and I, with our weekly comic book/geek podcast, do songs occasionally, and we are a little more twisted than you are. However we don’t have sensors breathing down our necks like you do.

    It was a lot of fun and you are a pretty good singer man. I am not sure I would want you to replace Vince Neil, but in a pinch you rocked it out damn good. I can’t wait to see you this January in Minneapolis, that is if I can get the night off from the kids.


  9. Deltus says:

    I don’t think I’ve seen works of yours yet, sir, that compares to the level of glam rock comedic awesomeness that I just experienced. I had missed the balls on the mic the first time viewing it, they put the visual cherry on a luscious audio cupcake. And I don’t mind telling you, I’m pleasuring myself furiously and gratuitously even as I type this, OUT OF RESPECT!

  10. mark says:

    that was killer.merry christmas.

  11. Djegovsky says:

    Content blocked in Brazil…
    : (

  12. smartbunny says:

    Excellent song! Amazing video! Chris is totally hot. OH HELL YES.

  13. Tim says:

    Who couldn’t tell who you were? The legally blind?

  14. Joey says:

    You make drag look like a good idea.

  15. John B Duff says:

    “This video contains content from Comcast Entertainment Group, who has decided to block it in your country. “

  16. Meg says:

    love it!! ftw all the way!! the crotch sling you have going on (or whatever it’s called) is so amazing! and the other talented peeps featured are definitely a plus. haha have a great christmas, happy new year, happy hanukkah and all of that! i am so thankful to twitter for connecting me with you this year-you are beyond fabulous! (as well as this awesome video, of course) — thanks for making my 2009 that much sweetaaaaaah! (exclamations abound for good reason in this post!) ps i SO knew it was you in this. just fyi. 😉

  17. Justine says:

    Did I tell you I love you lately? Tweeted it 😀

  18. Patti says:

    Oh, believe me, Chris, I knew exactly who you were in the video, you sexy beast! Fantastic! I’ve been sharing it on twitter and in chats. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!! Thanks to everyone involved. You international folks might be able to watch from the G4 site. My friend @ludovicaa is English, and she had no trouble. Here: Hope that works for you.

  19. Kaileigh says:

    Completely wowed but at the same time disturbed….

  20. Julia says:

    I was all excited to watch the video, then I got a vertual slap in the face by Comcast…and then AOTS played it! Incredibly good luck having it play while I was typing this. IT WAS AWESOME! XD I wish I could show this to everyone, but everyone I know lives here in Canada, so I guess that won’t be possible.
    Keep making us smile and laugh! Have a very Merry Christmas and rockin’ New Year! 😀

  21. Tammy says:

    Hilarious!!! As a child of ’80’s buttrock I must say, Well done, sir!
    Never heard of you before (sorry). If I come see you when you’re in Austin, do you promise to wear this outfit?

  22. Charlie says:

    haha so great i was wondering when this would finally come out

  23. Johnny Oz says:

    This video contains content from Comcast Entertainment Group, who has decided to block it in your country.

    Excuse me Chris, I have something important to say:
    Fuck you Comcast.

    🙂 If anybody’s got a Canadian/Australian/British/ANYWHERE ELSE OTHER THAN US link, I’m sure it would be greatly appreciated.

  24. Liza says:

    This is so full of win!

  25. Isaac Farrell says:

    Oh my God, it’s full of stars.

    Was that a video or a flashback? I’m pretty sure I remember Martha Quinn introducing this right after Billy Squier’s “The Stroke”.

    I know that despite the slightly too small ironic t-shirts and fancy sneakers, you do not, as they say, “play for my team”, Mr. Hardwick, but I am completely smitten. And, seriously, how could I not be?

    Have a holly jolly Christmas.

  26. Giovanni G. says:

    “…sip of my creamy nog…”
    hahahahaha gross!

    and you do always wear slightly too small T shirts

  27. Joe says:

    Wow… Every 80’s rock video cliche in one convenient package.

    Guys wearing makeup… Check
    guys wearing womens’ clothes… Check
    Random things being broken in slo-mo… Check

    I think the only thing you missed was to have the guitar and bass players go back to back, or have them line up and do “the lunge”. Maybe it’s in there and I just missed it. I was on an awesome overload. Well done sirs.

    Oh, and I LOL’d hard at the line “take a sip of my creamy nog” … Wow.

  28. Beau Ryan says:

    dude, you must get laid like all the time.

  29. Nick says:

    *cry* us poor Canadians….blocked out from what I assume is epicness, we need a link for the non-USA peoples who like you! ^_^

  30. Staci says:

    Will you marry me?

  31. Adam M says:

    Us poor Aussies are blocked as well…

    Now all I want for Christmas is to see glam-rock christmas song!

  32. Scott says:

    Anyone have a link viewable by Canadians? It says the deviant folk at Comcast Entertainment have decided to block it.

  33. carlin says:

    why is it when I pull a knife on santa every body screams, women get all the benefits…

  34. Barny-Boo says:

    *slow clap*
    All I want for Christmas is more things breaking spliced into my videos.

  35. Jeff says:

    Any chance you could make this available for Canada? I’ve been eating up every bit of news from twitter and was very sad when youtube told me I couldn’t see it.

  36. Glass says:

    My eyes are burning from the awesome.

  37. Michelle says:

    It’s funny cause it’s true.. and we can laugh about it now.. otherwise you’d be shoved in a locker, somewhere, hanging by your Alf tightie-whities, and/or suspenders, whichever was more accessible… =P

  38. Aaron says:

    you laugh now but thats how the holidays were in the 80’s

  39. Michelle says:

    I.. don’t believe that there are any words in existence that will be able to describe this accurately… I feel a bit dirty for having viewed that.. and somehow oddly attracted to,.. almost in a very creepy way, aroused to a certain extent by this.. this… I feel a tad bit dirty for watching, have I mentioned that? … almost feel the need to subtly download to PSP for my own viewing pleasure later… in a dark place… You really are a 80’s metal band… In fact: Only guys that wear spiked collars with a bandana (!lol), a girls stretch, B&W stripe baby-tee, Gold! spandex, bell-bottom leggings/pants with red/black zebra print in the cut-outs and torn cotton strands for a shirt can make the girls (and some select men), throw their panties on stage or just at singers head.. A True Gift Gentlemen.. … I almost forgot the cowboy hat…

  40. that was amazing!!! the mic alone killed it!! you have out done yourself again, sir.

  41. Dylan Wise says:

    This is XXX-MAS Gold! Why wasn’t this on the CDR X-Mas CD?

  42. Mary says:

    I still can’t believe that’s you singing. This is not proof. And you are 20 years late with this song.

  43. Kijan says:

    OMG soo funny! BTW love the outfit