The coolest guy in the band is always the bass player. Hey, don’t get mad at me! That’s not my opinion, that’s just scientific fact, long ago proven by researchers at Funkytown University.
Okay, fine, it is my opinion, and no I did not go to Funkytown University (I never even audited a class there), but bass players exude a coolness that is unmatched. It’s just a sexy instrument, one that you can simply hold without even playing and still look like the hippest person that ever lived. Plus, there are so many ways to play it, which means there are so many ways to look cool. Don’t believe me? Then just watch this video of a bassist seamlessly using 30 different techniques to play his bass–in just two minutes–and tell me it’s not the best.
This comes from YouTube user Davie504, and his many ways of rocking out vary from the totally standard, to the totally weird, to one that isn’t even technically “playing.”
So what are the 30 ways to play the bass?
- Palm muting
- 2 fingers
- Knob tweaking
- Strumming Chords
- Double thumb
- 2 hands tapping
- 1 hand tapping
- Zero hands tapping (THIS WAS INEVITABLE!)
- Natural harmonics
- Tapped harmonics
- Octave playing
- Artificial harmonics
- Using a guitar as a pick (Not as cool as using a violin to play a guitar, like Spinal Tap‘s Nigel Tufnel, but it still counts!)
- 3 fingers (4 fingers would be ostentatious)
- Pick & slap
- Sweep picking
- Teeth (He must have forgotten about “Post-bending” and “Off-season bending.”)
- Neck bending
That guy, for those two minutes, was the coolest man to ever live. Oh, and he’s also crazy talented and that was awesome.
Okay, so what’s your favorite technique? Did he leave one out? Let us know all your thoughts in the comments below.